Not all women are called to motherhood….
God calls some people are called to single life, and that’s where He wants them. I just think it’s important for women like Katheryn to discern carefully. Is her feeling that she “does not want children” a hint from God that the single life is His plan for her? Or is because our culture has been telling us all our lives that children are incredibly difficult to raise, are nothing but trouble, and will completely wreck your body, your intellect, and your happiness?
I think Katheryn’s reflection on accepting children being an essential part of marriage shows that she’s approaching this question from the right direction.
In our larger society, something’s up when so many people are rejecting parenthood. And so often it’s for the same old reasons: career and “freedom.” (I picked up the new copy of Real Simple at the store yesterday and found another article along the lines of “I’m so glad I didn’t spawn, my life is just the way I like it!”)
It’s all a natural outgrowth of our culture’s basic assumptions about life, love, and sex: My life belongs to me, and the purpose of my life is pleasing myself. Sex is primarily for pleasure. Therefore marriage is primarily for pleasure; children are optional. If children are optional, they are a troublesome and annoying option because they get in the way of pleasure. (Same goes for spouses, by the way; when he fails to please me, time to get rid of him.)
Part of the problem may be that that with our culture’s emphasis on delaying marriage until you’re done with school and have established the all-important career, it’s really easy to suddenly find yourself in a position where there simply aren’t as many opportunities for meeting people. Plus, it seems that the longer you remain single, the greater the temptation is to get set in your ways.
It’s so sad, really. Careers come and go, and can be over in a moment. Children grow up in the blink of an eye, but they live forever.