{"id":1836,"date":"2006-07-18T18:41:08","date_gmt":"2006-07-18T23:41:08","guid":{"rendered":"http:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/?p=1836"},"modified":"2006-07-18T18:41:08","modified_gmt":"2006-07-18T23:41:08","slug":"what-shamu-taug","status":"publish","type":"post","link":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/2006\/07\/what-shamu-taug\/","title":{"rendered":"What Shamu Taught Me About a Happy Marriage"},"content":{"rendered":"<p>I forget where I saw <a href=\"http:\/\/www.nytimes.com\/2006\/06\/25\/fashion\/25love.html?ex=1153281600&#038;en=893b698da201a420&#038;ei=5070\">this<\/a> (NYT &#8212; registration), but it is a scream:<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>AS I wash dishes at the kitchen sink, my husband paces behind me, irritated. &#8220;Have you seen my keys?&#8221; he snarls, then huffs out a loud sigh and stomps from the room with our dog, Dixie, at his heels,<br \/>\nIn the past I would have been right behind Dixie. I would have turned off the faucet and joined the hunt while trying to soothe my husband with bromides like, &#8220;Don&#8217;t worry, they&#8217;ll turn up.&#8221; But that only made him angrier, and a simple case of missing keys soon would become a full-blown angst-ridden drama starring the two of us and our poor nervous dog.<br \/>\nNow, I focus on the wet dish in my hands. I don&#8217;t turn around. I don&#8217;t say a word. I&#8217;m using a technique I learned from a dolphin trainer.<\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>I usually don&#8217;t like articles about &#8220;husband training&#8221; with that whole &#8220;husbands are stupid&#8221; vibe, but I got a kick out of this one.<\/p>\n<blockquote><p>After two years of exotic animal training, my marriage is far smoother, my husband much easier to love. I used to take his faults personally; his dirty clothes on the floor were an affront, a symbol of how he didn&#8217;t care enough about me. But thinking of my husband as an exotic species gave me the distance I needed to consider our differences more objectively.<br \/>\nI adopted the trainers&#8217; motto: &#8220;It&#8217;s never the animal&#8217;s fault.&#8221; When my training attempts failed, I didn&#8217;t blame Scott&#8230;. I dissected my own behavior, considered how my actions might inadvertently fuel his. <\/p><\/blockquote>\n<p>I&#8217;m totally going to take notes.<\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"<p>I forget where I saw this (NYT &#8212; registration), but it is a scream: AS I wash dishes at the kitchen sink, my husband paces behind me, irritated. &#8220;Have you seen my keys?&#8221; he snarls, then huffs out a loud sigh and stomps from the room with our dog, Dixie, at his heels, In the&hellip; <a class=\"more-link\" href=\"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/2006\/07\/what-shamu-taug\/\">Continue reading <span class=\"screen-reader-text\">What Shamu Taught Me About a Happy Marriage<\/span><\/a><\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":3,"featured_media":0,"comment_status":"open","ping_status":"open","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[5],"tags":[],"class_list":["post-1836","post","type-post","status-publish","format-standard","hentry","category-parenting-and-family-life","entry"],"_links":{"self":[{"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1836","targetHints":{"allow":["GET"]}}],"collection":[{"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts"}],"about":[{"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/types\/post"}],"author":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/users\/3"}],"replies":[{"embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/comments?post=1836"}],"version-history":[{"count":0,"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/posts\/1836\/revisions"}],"wp:attachment":[{"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/media?parent=1836"}],"wp:term":[{"taxonomy":"category","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/categories?post=1836"},{"taxonomy":"post_tag","embeddable":true,"href":"https:\/\/moss-place.stblogs.org\/index.php\/wp-json\/wp\/v2\/tags?post=1836"}],"curies":[{"name":"wp","href":"https:\/\/api.w.org\/{rel}","templated":true}]}}