Regnum Christi recently started a La Familias group in my area. I was very excited to join because I have been waiting for something of this sort for a long time. I have only been a couple of times, but I am enjoying reading about the Pope's words on marriage and the family with other women.
Last week I think I stepped on some toes. One of the discussion questions was "how do we protect our families from evil in the world?" The answers started flowing out "turn off the TV", "only wear dresses", "homeschool". Someone said "build a strong personal relationship with your children" which is the answer that made the most sense.
I have been struggling for the past year with the fact that most of the homeschooling teens I see around here in real life are not ones I would have my children around. Before we started homeschooling, there was a great deal of propaganda that if you homeschool, your children will not be troubled teens, will be smart and always stay in the faith. It's like the propaganda surrounding NFP. "NFP builds marriages"-whatever. While I think there are always better choices, NFP for example, will not fix a marriage that is in trouble (unless of course the trouble is simply birth control). Same with homeschooling. I see a great deal of good in homeschooling which is why we do so, but not as a cure all over a relationship with your children. Not over putting parenting in God's hands and asking the Holy Spirit to guide you in correct decisions regardless of how much "evil" you try to keep from them.
I do not mean to vent so, but I get kind of discouraged when Catholics get started so much on the "evil in the world" subject. I know I personally am never doing it right in many a Catholic's eyes. I allow my children to watch occasional TV with Spongebob in his underwear, I allow my daughter to wear pants and the list goes on. But I just don't think God cares so much about some of these things. I see so many parents obsessing about the evils of Harry Potter, while their teenage daughters are having aborrtions behind their backs.
My brothers attended traditional parochial schools all their lives. I think the way my parents raised them would qualify as quite evil in many people's eyes. Yet they turned out the way I want my children to turn out. They are funny, down to earth, smart and practice their faith. Sometimes I think the devil puts up issues to distract us from real evil quite literally in front of us. I think that unless I personally develop a better prayer life and conversation with the Holy Spirit, those issues will always distract me from what I really need to do.
Just to clarify, I am not trying to put down anybody's parenting decisions in raising Holy children. I am just vocalising the fact that there are many decisions I have made in the past simply to appear "Holy" to other families on issues that not only did I truly feel made no difference, but made my children feel "weird". I don't think that is what God is calling me to do as a mother. And I just get tired of hearing "I never...that's evil, that's horrible...that secretly means..." and I rarely hear "oh, that was so much fun".
