It has actually been something of a trial trying to figure out when to use "scene" instead of "seen" or "hear" instead of "here". I really thought I was losing my mind. Many people in real life will totally think I have. The Upstate NY Moss's are expecting a new Mossling I am thinking in November sometime.
I haven't told anyone in real life. I am afraid to tell my family, (although one of my brothers might pass by the blog) because I am afraid of the comments. Actually my immediate family will be OK, but the extended family-it will be worse than telling them someone died. I was thinking of simply not telling. My grandmother is literally going to say "oh no, you can't afford this,"
I also have had mixed feelings about the whole thing. I do not feel I like I ever really got into the swing of things after having Gorbulas. My house is never as clean as I like, I am tired, I have been nursing for like five years straight and thought by this summer I would be able to wear a normal one piece dress. I was secretly hoping Gorbulas was my last toddler. No parenting book has given me greater depth into understanding these odd little people who always spill things and make lots of noise, but melt your heart with their mispronunciations and giggles. But God has a sense of humour and come 21 months time, there will be another toddler around.
The flip side there is nothing quite as spiritual as carrying a little baby around inside of you. I do not know if men can relate to this at all, but this one of the most special times in a woman's life. I have been wracking my brain for the past couple of days as to why being pregnant seems to have such a specialness all it's own different from any other stage of motherhood. I cannot come up with many answers except it is the shortest and most fleeting. I have to think on this a little more. This actually the first time I have even admitted this because it seems people pay more attention to the expecting part of parenting than they do children (after you get past the fact that it should have been a perfectly planned situation).
In the meantime, I have little blogging time. I am making pierogies to put in the freezer. As "morning" sickness seems to deepen a bit each day, I want to stock the freezer up with meals that take no effort to cook. We usually end up eating frozen food or out too often at this stage because I cannot stand the site or smell of food, and am so exhausted by the end of the day. I hate doing that because of the expense and lack of good nutritious food for the family. So I am trying to prepare as many healthy meals in advance, maybe an extra meal each day.
whooo-hoooooooooo! what a blessing! oh how precious and wonderful! and SpecialK over at summa mamas just delivered baby no. 4 this morning, her first girl! babies, babies, babies! weeeeeee! God is in His heavens and His love for us abounds!
Congratulations!! May you and your littlest one be blessed throughout this pregnancy and beyond!
Oh, congratulations!
May this baby be a remarkable source of joy in your life. And may morning sickness be brief!
--Sparki
Bless you, hon.
Hurray, hurray, hurray, hurray!!!!!!!
Cheers to all the Mosslings! I couldn't be more thrilled! Yee haw!!!
Congrats again, Pansy. I admire your industriousness with the meal planning. That hasn't been the story around here.
This pregnancy at first seemed to deepen my spiritual life. One of the best things I could have to thank God for, but a bit of a trial that was expected to be greatly worth it but required a lot of faith (I mean did I even know the baby was in there? The only signs s/he gave me were lack of a certain something, a positive test, and feeling yucky.) I made myself eat wonderfully nutritious food I could hardly stand, for the sake of baby.
But after a while I became a self-pitying slug, and that's pretty much where I am today.
You have my sympathies and vicarious indignance about the reaction of relatives. We're only having #2 and aren't in contact with any rabidly environmentalist family members or anything, so it's not on that count, but I do dread interrogation about my birth plans after the c-section last time. I always picture myself breathing fire at anyone who dared tsk at the existence of my child because I had "too many" but I'm sure it would be less simple if I were really faced with it.
D's M-
My family who has negative things to say are just plain negative. I do not think they could care less about my birth plans whether if it is by C-section or not. They just like to note their objection by having so many kids.
What happy news! I wish you a healthy pregnancy and a safe delivery!
I am so happy for you, Pansy! We'll keep you in prayer regarding the pregnancy & the family reactions. God bless you and your little one.
Yeah, that's what I meant. I'm not there yet with the numbers, although I probably will be someday since I have relatives who "run screaming" at the thought of large families, but am filled with dread of talking about it anyway.
I do not understand people who would have the gall to voice their disapproval of a pregnancy to your face, particularly when they're in the family! I mean, the baby's there, what do they expect you to do about it? It's not like you can just pull the receipt out of your wallet and take it back to Babies R Us or whatever.
I agree Peony, but it will not change there reaction.
Dear Pansy,
God bless you! I've got two wonderful kids about whose incarnation I was ambivalent at first--I survived, and so will you. They are so hilarious when they get to be 9 and 14 years old!
And how Gorbulas will love the baby-pal!
Peony, my own PARENTS at #3 were tsk-tsk'ing. Fortunately, my mom died long before #4 was born (not as rotten as it sounds--I know she's in heaven, smiling down at them all).
But when I got pre-eclampsia, my dad said, "Let them take (i.e. kill) the baby!" He was really hysterical when I got pregnant with #5!
But we named #5 after him. And the last two are the closest to him! It means more than he ever imagined!
Hey, Pansy--
Have you told your Amish neighbors? I'll bet some of them would be delighted to help out with some covered dishes! That's one thing Protestants really shine at! :-)
God bless you, bless you, bless you!
D's mom--
Do you, by chance, know about Drs. John Bruchalski and Marie Anderson at the TEPEYAC FAMILY CENTER in Fairfax, VA?
Orthodox Catholic all the way, and medically astute. They have no fear--they trust in the Lord and pray through every delivery!
For more information, go here:
http://www.tepeyacfamilycenter.com .
Don't tell the Amish about the pregnancy. Most Amish don't discuss it at all - it becomes obvious but it is not a topic for discussion, especially not between men and women.
I have a good midwife friend who midwifes a large amish community in Indiana. They birth wonderfully but don't talk about it. The most I would say directly might be to ask (woman to women OR man to man) if they can give you the name of the midwife who cares for their community.
Congratulations! God bless your newest blessing.
KTC -- they were my OBs with Davey, and they're not very supportive of VBAC. I've got my plans down though :)
Congratulations!
D's Mom--
I'm shocked and disappointed to hear that! I'll certainly pray. If Gwyneth Paltrow can have her baby at home, I'll bet you'll be able to have a VBAC!
Alicia,
I was not going to tell the Amish because I have noticed our neighbors do not mention it either. I was going to pull the lady of the house next door and ask her what they do about midwives and so on. My midwife from when we had Gorbulas is just too far, and I hate to play the "find a compatible doctor game" again.
Thanks, Kathy :)
Congratulations!!! I just love to read happy news! :)
The relative thing is difficult, especially when you are tired and hormonal. I guess the best thing I can say is that it will seem a lot less dismal (and maybe even funny) some time down the road. I remember making a special dinner at which we told my in-laws about the arrival of #6. You'd have thought someone had died. No, actually, I've been to livelier wakes. Of course, my mother's cousin got her licks in with a letter which said (among other complaints about my sister and me) that it was a good thing my mother was dead because my crazy reproductive habits would have killed her. That cracks me up - especially since cousin 'Pete' and my mom were always very close. Which wouldn't have happened if my grandparents hadn't had #7 (MOM!)
It's so depressing that *everyone* with large families (meaning as few as three children in some cases) seems to get these comments made directly to them. I really would have thought only maybe every 500th person was rude enough. And it does shock me from the older crowd, especially if they're Catholic.
Remind me to do all my complaining about pregnancy ills (if I must complain) to like-minded people. No need to give anyone more ammunition. Sometimes I really understand why people with a different worldview stop at 2 kids, or space very widely, but I don't think many of them would understand that my having a large family (God willing) in spite of that isn't because I'm a mindless, oppressed follower of some celibate old man dictating what I can do in my bedroom, and that I don't wish I had the "freedom" they do to contracept. I just wish my nausea and insomnia would go away, and that 2-year-olds and exhaustion went together better!
Ohmigoodness, Pansy, that's so wonderful! Praise the Lord and pass the babies!
But I totally understand about the ambivalence, and the relatives. I'm only cooking #2, and there are days I think I should have waited a little longer. My 2-year-old toddler is just weaning; I would have loved a break from breastfeeding!
I made it very clear to my parents when I married that Clayton and I wanted a big family; I've made it clear to my friends and co-workers, too. But I still get all the stupid comments. The two I hate the most: "Won't it be nice to have your two and be done!" (Like I have a maximum quota or something.) Stupid comment #2 comes after I say we want a big family, "Oh, we'll see how you feel after this baby! (with a smirk)."
I've had women say this to me who've never had kids! And I had lots of people say it when I was cooking #1! Grrrr.
My response? "Well, since Alex had four months of non-stop colic, a cow's milk allergy, a soy allergy, and a dozen cases of thrush, which I also had, I think I can handle another baby, thanks." Always said with a sweet smile.
For goodness' sake, I brought Alex to World Youth Day in 40C heat, when he was still exclusively breastfed. I think I'm tough enough, thanks. And if I'm not, the Lord will provide the strength I need.
There, rant over. Sorry, hormones took over for awhile. I just wish people would stop treating me like a hick, or a teenage mother.