Pansy: "My 36-year old husband has been cheating on me with a 22-year old girl. He is leaving us for her (we have been married 15 1/2 years and have seven children). If that isn't bad enough, he is home now and is berating me and telling me why it is all my fault. I found conversations between he and this girl where they laugh at me behind my back. I knew it was going on for some time, but I found the evidence and it all came to a head a few hours ago. I have to change my life in the next few hours practically, financially, deal with this emotionally and all the above and I don't know how I can take my next breath."
Please, please, please pray for Pansy and her family.
And, to answer a question, if you wish to help Pansy temporally:
If you want to do your Amazon shopping through our referral link (right sidebar), every penny of that goes to Pansy as well.
Poor Pansy! This is absolutely horrible! I am so very sorry. Please know that you all will be in my prayers.
Also, my best friend's husband is a divorce attorney and while I sincerely hope that your marriage can be healed and saved, she did suggest that I mention to you that you might not want to blog about this. If lawyers were to get involved, as unfair as it sounds, they would, in all likelihood, try to use your words against you. Forgive me for discussing such unpleasant things but I would just hate to see something like that happen to you!
Sending you many, many hugs!
Oh, and feel free not to post this I just didn't see an email address anywhere.
I am so sorry. In addition to being very pissed off.
You have my prayers as well as a donation.
www.retrouvaille.org
I'm so sorry. **prayers** for your strength, and for him to come to his senses and ask your forgiveness.
I am So SAD to hear this. I decided to get back to the blogs today after a long hiatus and this news is devastating. I will echo what Fr. Keyes days, retrouvaille is a life saver. But for now I think that leaving is probably the sanest thing. Marriages can and have survived this kind of betrayal, Greg and Julie Alexander have a very moving personal story about this. I have seen retrouvaille do miracles.
I am remembering the stop we made with Pansy and family when we moved from NH to IL, such a wonderful well behaved bunch of children! and how this is going to affect them breaks my heart. Know that you do have my prayers.
I am So SAD to hear this. I decided to get back to the blogs today after a long hiatus and this news is devastating. I will echo what Fr. Keyes days, retrouvaille is a life saver. But for now I think that leaving is probably the sanest thing. Marriages can and have survived this kind of betrayal, Greg and Julie Alexander have a very moving personal story about this. I have seen retrouvaille do miracles.
I am remembering the stop we made with Pansy and family when we moved from NH to IL, such a wonderful well behaved bunch of children! and how this is going to affect them breaks my heart. Know that you do have my prayers.
I am praying for you and your family! I've checked in on this blog for years, but rarely comment. Some of our kids are the same age, and I feel like I know you. It breaks my heart that you and your children are going through this. I wish there was more I could do... praying...
Praying.
I'm back -- I woke up in the middle of the night and remembered the marriage builders website and that I should have mentioned it:
http://marriagebuilders.com/graphic/mbi5525_qa.html
A large percentage of marriages do survive infidelity. That website talks about how to be in the half that survive.
**hugs**
I'm just mindblown for you, Pansy. What a crushing revelation. And on top of it all, he's putting this on you?! You've got my prayers, and I put St. Monica on the case as well. ((((you))))
Praying here.
Praying. Also, we stopped by Mount Saint Mary's Abbey today and I asked the Cistercian sisters to pray.
+JMJ+
Pansy, I'll be praying for you, too!
Miss Peony,
I make almost no use of credit cards, most particularly over the internet. Would it be possible to leave a name and a mailing address in the comment box on my blog? I have arranged for comments to be moderated for my approval so it will not appear publicly.
OH my darling, I am so sorry.
My husband walked out on my 11 years ago this Nov 7. He left me with 4 children under the age of 8 after 11 years of marriage.
I will keep you in my prayers. Just take one day at a time and make sure you have lots of spiritual and physical support.
With all due respect to Fr. Jeffrey - Retrouvaille is not what Pansy and her husband need.
The Catholic church just doesn't get it. Each and every diocese needs crisis counselling - they need couples who have been married for years and have been fully trained as crisis intervenors. Someone who can step in to help a couple like this one who is in crisis. An authentic Catholic man who can step in and call Pansy's husband to task and challenge him to live up to his vows for the sake of his wife and children, if not for himself.
Do you really believe her husband is interested in Retrouvaille? Retrouvaille has its place and time but this is NOT the time.
So sorry I can't even begin to find words.
As for berating you, I've run into these kind of situations with friends and relatives and I can say that is almost universal. When you do something so deeply wrong you have to either repent and quit or create a fantasy world where your act is somehow justified. I'm so sorry for you and your children, having to deal with this.
Stunned and praying ...
I'm so sorry, Pansy, and will be praying for you and your family. Peony, could you please send me an email with info on how I can send a check? (I can't do PayPal right now.)
Michelle, I'll ask Pansy about that, but we may be able to put up more info later this week about contribution by checks.
Dear Pansy, I know it must be hard to take advise from total strangers, but there are many of us Women that have gone thru this.. and it is VERY hard to deal with.. My husband & I actually separated for 6months ten years ago for this very reason, I was all set to try and raise my 4 girls all on my own... I prayed daily for God to help me deal with it all.... after all I still loved my husband very much, I prayed for spiritual guidance, and I prayed for help in forgiving him... crazy I know... He converted to Catholicism, without me even knowing he began the classes. I forgave him, we have been married for 21years now. He & I serve our parish as Eucharistic Ministers, he sings for our church, and is a lector. Prayer does WORK!!! Many hugs & Many Prayers for you and your family!
BC,
Been praying continuously. :)
I would definitely check out retrovaille. I'd check out a good divorce attorney too. If you don't know your options you don't have any! Will pray for you and the your family.