Peony Moss: December 2003 Archives

Revelry at the PGMP will involve a batch of Irish Coffee, a nice hunk of Stilton, and a rented movie (XMen 2). We'll be having friends over for dinner tomorrow evening.

...or whatever it's called. Specifically, a free one. I was using FeedDemon but it's going paid. And I like free.

Thanks to Bec for bringing us this vital information.

Found today: one maraca and one little wooden sign, both in a basket that had been searched before. All we need now is the striker for the triangle and we'll be three for three.

Perhaps part of the problem was the big basket -- too easy to lose little things in there. We recently picked up some plain white dishpan-type boxes for sorting out blocks, cars, and trains. It should be easier to pick out what does and doesn't belong. I got a little carried away this afternoon --
click here to see one of the labels I made for each dishpan.

This is my usual mumbling over some issue and then trying to find a nice spot for sitting on the fence. Bobbi asks, in our comments box and on her own fine blog, how we handle the Santa question:

How do you allow them to use their imagination and enjoy make-believe stories and still let them know the difference between what's real (God taking the form of a baby and angels announcing his birth to humans on earth) and what's not (elves making toys in the north pole)?

And how I wish I had an answer! I am still mulling over how to handle Santa, and I wish my husband and I were in more harmony on this issue.

The two biggest objections to Santa seem to be that Santa tends to crowd out the Christ Child and that playing Santa involves lying to children.

At first I did not share these objections. My parents did Santa when I was growing up, and I always knew Who Christmas is really about. When I figured out that Santa wasn't real (by realizing his handwriting looked an awful lot like my mother's) I don't remember feeling especially traumatized by the discovery -- could it really be that big a deal?

But now I'm not so sure. I may have known Who Christmas is really about when I was a child, but there's a difference between knowing with the intellect and knowing with the heart. I've blogged before about the punchcard approach to the faith -- you go to Mass, sing a few perfunctory songs, and then rush home for the real part of Christmas: the presents. Perhaps too much emphasis on Santa (or on Papa Noel or whoever else brings the gifts) could so occupy a young child's hopes and emotions that there's not much energy left for the Christ Child. Little children learn by seeing and doing, and if 90% of what they see and do in the weeks before Christmas is Santa, Santa, Santa..... Even when they leave belief in Santa behind, will all they retain be presents, presents, presents?

As for discovering that Santa Isn't Real: Bobbi and La Famiglia Cacciaguida point out that if a parent first teaches a child that Santa is real, only to backpedal and say, no, Santa is make-belive, what is that going to do to the child's belief in other things that may seem make-believe but are actually real? Things like angels and the Real Presence? Especially when children might start figuring Santa out about the same time they are making their First Communions?

I have also talked to adults who do remember being disturbed to find out that Santa wasn't real -- and to adults whose preschool children are frightened by the idea of some man entering their house when everyone's asleep (perhaps it gets too close to fears of burglars and other intruders?)

Yet I am not ready to go No Santa Anytime Anywhere. Santa is everywhere, and I don't think it's fair to ask little Christian children to go around with their hands over their eyes, telling their little friends that We Don't Do Santa Because Santa is Evil. I don't like turning Christianity into the Religion of No -- we are not Puritans or Jehovah's Witnesses. Besides, everyone else in my family does Santa and I don't want to come off as attacking them (they already think I'm a religious fanatic) or unnecessarily exclude Hambet from the fun.

Plus, my husband is not ready to give up on Santa! I think part of the reason parents do Santa is that it gives them a chance to have a little fun, to play with -- and be generous to -- children.

I think I would like to take the approach of Santa Lite: allow Hambet to shake Santa's hand, learn the stories about Santa, and so on, but always with the knowledge that Santa is just a Really Fun Pretend. Perhaps we could also skip the trip to tell Santa about what we want for Christmas. Meanwhile, we will work on making a Nice Soft Bed for Baby Jesus (a friend of mine did this, and her preschool boys loved it! She does have a dedicated Baby Jesus, so that helped her avoid the problem Sparki ran into.)

As long as we're talking about Fun Pretends, I am pro-Tooth Fairy and detest the Easter Bunny. If we get the fun but non-pretend St Nicholas involved, it will be for oranges and chocolate coins in the shoes on his own feast day, and for his intercession. And I will not get into the "be good, Santa is watching you" thing at all. It's just too weird, and cruel for the littlest ones.

You are Melanie Hamilton. A true lady. You are
generous, loyal, giving and can see only the
best in people. You are willing to go out of
your way to help anyone, even if it's against
public opinion. You can be surprisingly firm if
the occasion calls for it.


Which Character from 'Gone With The Wind' are you?
brought to you by Quizilla

My dear husband almost never reads our blog. I think he finds it too girly. The other day he called me over to the computer, showed me the blog he was reading, and told me, "Now this is what a real blog looks like. See? Discussion of real issues. No Weather Pixies. No recipes."

The blog was Bettnet. Now I see that Dom has kindly posted a recipe for lentil soup. So I owe Signor Bettinelli twice over now.

I think there is some kind of space-time anomaly in my house.

How else to account for all the weird things that keep disappearing? Keys, lids to travel mugs, books, rolls of tape, silver gel markers, and toys -- especially toys -- keep disappearing.

Sometimes these things do reappear: usually when I'm not looking for them, sometimes in places I'd never thought to look, sometimes in places that I was sure I'd already looked. The other day I swear a cassette tape just materialized onto a shelf that had been empty thirty minutes previously.

Sometimes, they never do reappear, or only turn up after I've despaired of finding them (for example, the book I lost one Easter and discovered on Christmas Eve, wedged deep in the upholstery, long after I'd replaced it.)

This drives me nuts. I have this weird compulsive side that becomes profoundly uneasy if there's a piece missing from a set (I especially hate when puzzle pieces get misplaced; I keep puzzles out of reach now and only dole out a new one when the old one is turned in intact.) I probably should be working in an OR and not as the at-home mother of a little boy who got toys with jillions of pieces for Christmas. I probably should not have been the one who gave him those toys, either.

Some things get lost because I put them someplace "just for a moment" and then forget all about it. Some things get lost because Hambet has hidden them someplace. But for some things, I just have no explanation. There's either some kind of esoteric physics involved or Saint Anthony and my Guardian Angel are hiding things, perhaps to teach me a lesson.

Well, dear Saint and dear Angel, whether or not you're behind this latest round of disappearances, I promise I've learned my lesson. Please help me -- some of these things have not even spent 48 hours in my household.

Missing:
one little wooden train sign
one striker for the triangle from the marching band set (last seen on the shelf above the computer; I have no idea how it vanished from there)
one maraca

I was going to include one toucan and one panda bear on the list, but somehow overnight these two critters reappeared and joined their mates on Noah's Ark.

Welcome to our sidebar:

Pencil in Your Hand: Bec is the homeschooling mother of two teenage boys

A Song of November

Homeschooler Joyce has moved Ora et Labora to a new URL at blogspot

We had a really happy, fun day but I went to bed tired and I'm still tired this morning. I could really, really use some coffee.

Today we'll just be washing things and putting things away. And playing with the new toys.

I came down with the flu yesterday. I don't think it's that dangerous kind; it's just one of those viruses that cause discomfort way out of proportion to their real severity ("I'm not that sick, why do I feel so awful?")

so here it is, the last few days before Christmas, and I can hardly get my head off the couch. If I don't get better before Tuesday evening we may have to postpone the Christmas dinner we have planned with friends.

UPDATE, TUESDAY MORNING: wow, we have powerful intercessors here! Between prayers, rest, and ibuprofen, I was revived enough by noon to do some baking and some (urgently needed) laundry. This morning the fever and body aches are completely gone. I still have a scratchy throat, but I can live with that. I still need to discuss Christmas with our guests -- they may not want to bring their little children around until I've been better longer.

New post from dylan

From Papa Noel Apologia, complete with a sweet little Christmas thought:

Some of us have gotten together a modest gift for Dylan and, in fact, KTC of the Gospelminefield has already sent it off at her own expense. Those of you who would like to contribute should email her at this address, and she'll tell you where to send the 2 bucks. Yes, a mere two bucks to brighten our friend's hopes this season of the Child who gave us everything, and all of Himself. Blessings to all so inclined. And may He show mercy to His poets.

Smockmomma has a little announcement.

and tuned in just in time to hear the news.

Steven writes that his wife is scheduled to be admitted to the hospital this afternoon, and asks for prayers for her -- and for their little boy, who will probably be at least a little disconcerted by Mommy going to the hospital.

www.cookiehelp.com (free registration required)

...including this one from Ms Susie Q:

Well!! Let me ask you this yvette [another commenter -- Peony]. Are you sure that 'jesus' is really the person you think he is?? I mean (before you go crazy :)) I mean, think about it, even 2,000 years ago people where con artists, just like some people are today. I am saying that what if.. this whole religon thing was made up?? I mean, back then anyone could have come into town and said 'I am the son of god' and people would have belived him. The Jews could be right, our 'savior' could still be coming. Budist could be right, romans, there are many gods. Witches are right about thier god and goddess. I think that religon is a state of mind, not a real thing. True, it does not sound that way. I think that ALL religons are right, and what I mean is whatever you belive in, that will be true for you. For example, you belive in reincarnation, so you get reincarnated. You belive in god and heaven and hell, so if your good you go to heaven, bad you go to hell, etc. Nobodys right, noone is wrong. I think you might disagree, that again your religon is the only way to 'god' but if you take a moment and think about, how did we get all these religons in the first place? Yes, people made some up, but you cant get so many from just human imagination. People might have had just sudden enlightment and understud what had to be done. And also yvette, knowing you, you probley do no belive in magic. But did you know that there is solid proof that moses used magic to spread the waters of the great sea to free the slaves?? Or that jesus used magic to heal blind men, walk on water, and turn water into wine? If he lived and walked this earth today, people would have considerd him a witch!!

Anyone care to help Miss Q? Comment here if you do. (Please, be gentle. This is not Two Salem Mommies. ;) )

Terri is 40 years old today. Bet she'd never dreamed this is how she'd be spending this birthday.